Transform Fear into Fuel – The Inner Conversation

Returning to the UK after an all too brief visit back to SA, the journey of change continues. This time I am joined by my eldest son who is launching his career as a music composer in the UK market. Our joint biggest challenge – to activate a UK income stream where he can build a career and my husband and I can enjoy our golden years through work and travel.
Settling into our UK base, I was a little surprised as I noticed the heightened anxiety this time around. One of my favourite questions for clients is: “Where does fear show up in your body?”. For me it is like knot under my rib cage and my inner introvert pulls me into a cocoon where I have to consciously step into a social space. Knowing that any change is going to challenge the brain’s status quo, I am very conscious and intentional of my inner dialogue and my physical response. One of the lessons I have learned as a global speaker is the value of turning adrenalin into energy, so the question is – how do I turn this fear into fuel that will drive the results I want to achieve?
We need to make friends with fear. For the brain, fear is what keeps us alive. It is a primal force that can either paralyze or spur us on to action beyond our natural ability. Fear is a multifaceted human emotion that, when overcome, is even sweeter. Most importantly fear is not reality – it is a perceived future that has not yet happened.
Here are three steps to turn that fear into fuel:
NOTICE IT
NAME IT
REFRAME IT
NOTICE IT
Our inner dialogue is where fear does her best work. The volume of our inner critic is multiplied and we have conversations with ourselves and other in the silence of our minds. When the brain listens to these conversations, it cannot distinguish between perception and reality.
The first technique is to pause and NOTICE your inner conversations’ content and emotional weighting. Colour them either RED or GREEN. Red conversations are characterized by anxiety and stress. Your brain will go into “fight, flight or freeze” mode when they happen. As the early warning alarm goes off, your brain will increasingly shut down anything it perceives as a threat – including closing down the parts of your brain that thrive on connection, relationship and motivation. This takes us down the road to failure.

NAME IT
One of the simplest techniques to quieten the fear response is to name it, preferably out loud. When we acknowledge our fear and give it a name it calms the brain – you have now given it something to work with. Simply make a clear and tangible statement, “ I am feeling a heightened level of anxiety and it is manifesting through poor sleep and withdrawing from people”. Preferably say it out loud to someone in your support group. By doing so, you activate the thinking brain by giving it a tangible problem to solve. It can now go into solution mode and start scanning for opportunity. Now remind your brain of what you would like to achieve and it will take that adrenalin and turn it into a more positive form of energy.
REFRAME IT
We now use the power of language to reframe fear from a destroyer of dreams to a champion of change. This will take us down the GREEN pathway to success. When we relanguage our inner conversation, our brain is listening. When we embrace fear as a normal and natural part of change our brain settles down and reopens connection, communication and motivation functions in the brain. It is here that your coach and your support group can play a vital role in reversing the cycle. So how do we do this?
A popular meme reframes fear from
Forget everything and run to Face everything and rise


LOOK LEFT – LOOK RIGHT
Here is a technique I use to reframe fear. I close my eyes and look to the left (this tells your brain it is doing something new) and I ask the question “Where is fear shutting me down? Say it out loud or write it in your journal.
Then I turn my head to the right and ask myself, – “where is fear my friend? – how can I turn it into a catalyst for change?
WHAT WILL CHANGE IF YOU DO THIS?
When we still fear we are able to choose response over reaction and we show up with emotional maturity which results in better decision making and stakeholder relationships. It unlocks the courage to adventure into the unknown and lays the groundwork for a culture of innovation and agile work.
So as I wake up in the morning I ask myself the question – how do I choose to respond? I choose to look fear boldly in the face and to rise. I choose to see change as gain, not as loss. I choose to set smaller milestones and celebrate each achievement. I choose to moderate and reframe my inner conversations from the pathway to failure to the pathway of success. And most importantly I choose to breathe and be fully present. The best antidote to FEAR is to live fully in the present, to take the actions and make the decisions today that will open the pipeline and floodgates of opportunity tomorrow.
If you would like to ignite a new conversation at your conference, in the boardroom or in your online channels, speak to Bev can upskill your leadership team and help you shape your next strategic, learning or leadership dialogue. You can reach her on:

UK Mobile: 0744 297 5951
Email: bev@bevhancock.com
Email: bev@kamva.net
Web: www.bevhancock.com
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/bevhancock